Romance

I'm in love with the idea of what we are doing. I'll admit it. I am thrilled when I have the opportunity to tell people our plans, thrilled when what I say doesn't register and then again when it does and that look of "you are [crazy, irresponsible, whatever] (and I'm secretly jealous of you because I'm here doing God knows what)". There may be some editorializing happening there...

My lines anymore feel almost scripted as I try to explain and remain vague, because let's face it, the plans are vague.

The script:

Them: So...I hear you're leaving us?

Me: Yeah, May 21st is my last day here.

What I want to say: Gettin' the hell out of dodge! Woohoo!

Them:...and what are you going to do? Where are you going?

Me: West.

What I want to say: Anything I want to do, anywhere I want to go. Away from you.

Them: West. What do you mean? You're not staying in Chicago?

Me: Well, we're going to travel this summer, and keep our eyes open for places to land.

What I want to say: Obviously not. I have no job, no home, no prospects, just a lot of student loan debt. And I'm ok with this so deal with it.

Them: So you are relocating this summer?

Me: Kind of. After a while.

What I want to say: Duh!

Them: What are you going to do out there in the West? Do you have places narrowed down?

Me: Yeah. I mean, we have it down to three states but we aren't limited ourselves. Oregon, Washington, and Colorado.

What I want to say: Nope, I'm totally playing this wild card.

Them: Oh wow. Those places are beautiful.

Me: Yes, thus the reason for our escape. We need to live somewhere with more...scenery...more outdoor lifestyle.

What I want to say: Somewhere over the rainbow....way up high....something something....bluebird sky...why oh why can't i...

Them: So what will you do in these places?

Me: I don't know. Put my expensive MA to good use? Teach maybe. I can always sling coffee shots again to get by.

What I want to say: Whatever the hell I want! I really have no idea.

Them: Oh, I didn't realize you had an MA.

Me: .... (thinking "this is one reason I'm leaving")

What I want to say: asshole

Them: Well, good luck.

What I want to say: Chump.

And they walk away confused, as though I've just turned their world upside down. I can also hear them thinking, "I hope my kid never pulls some dumb move like this."